Born Movie Reviews

Movie Analysis written by: Born Movie Reviews

Whether it is you had the misfortune of watching a bad movie or you intentionally wanted to see just how bad the movie was, there is no question that these movies need to be remembered for their shock factor. In this critic's opinion, 2012 has probably been the best year for movies since the new decade (superior to 2011, which was superior to 2010). Yes, one can easily find a film that is easily labeled as "junk," but here are the top five worst films that were not automatically viewed as junk. These are no Scary Movie 24. But, these were five films that I had the misfortune of sitting through, and made out alive from.

Number five has to go to the mediocrely superior sequel of Clash of the Titans, the atrocious film three years earlier. This time, the director's chair was handed to Jonathan Liebesman. Know what he did before? Battle: LA. Although this film does not suffer from shaky camerawork, it does suffer from the same flaws that plagued its predecessor. These flaws go from cardboard characters to horrible dialogue, from cheesiness to anti-climatic narratives. Still flatly acted by Sam Worthington, Liam Neeson, and Ralph Fiennes, Wrath of the Titans, if compared to Clash, is superior. This is thanks to better visuals, art direction, and a few more oohs and aahs. However, if looked at as a film alone, Wrath of the Titans inevitably falls under the top five worst films of 2012.

4. BATTLESHIP

Are you one of those forgiving people who enjoyed the first Transformers movie? Did you expect Battleship to be the same? I did. Unfortunately, I got the complete opposite. Before bringing in the aliens into the plot line, Battleship wastes almost forty minutes following a loser of a character, flatly played by Taylor Kitsch. Once the aliens do come in, the movie has already lost its audience, drowning in the sea of boredom. Afterwards, our boredom is punished with a film that is nothing but metal clanging and explosions. Although it did have a few moments that even paid homage to the original board game, Battleship could have been so much better. It could have been a simplistic movie that is entertainment and worthy of a ticket and a bag of popcorn. Nope. That was a miss.

3. THE APPARITION

When looking at the worst films of 2012, The Apparition has to be on this list. Why? Because it is the only film made by a big studio (Warner Bros.) where the film looks as if the cast and crew had no idea what to do and where to go with this project. Not even screened early for critics, The Apparition comes forth as a technology version of The Grudge, but as it progresses, it slowly forgets its purpose. Halfway in, none of the familiar characters are able to carry the movie on its own. This is a film that is completely shooting on the set at its worst. I am appallingly curious as to what everyone was doing on set. For a film that is not scary nor interesting, The Apparition is the horror genre gone wrong as well as simple filmmaking gone wrong. How can this be worse? If the trailer is completely different from the film itself.

2. CHERNOBYL DIARIES

Why don't we take the idea of Paranormal Activity, which I liked, and have it take place in Chernobyl? To be honest, it's an interesting idea. It bears an intriguing premise and it has promise. Add in some unfamiliar faces with good acting and Chernobyl Diaries could be a small but sharp film, similar to Chronicle. What can go wrong? Everything went wrong. Never before has a movie angered me and brought me to the brink of insanity. The film paid absolutely no respect to its characters. It is as if the film randomly picked a few people who don't use their heads and line them up to die. So, what is the point? Why should I care about these people? Why does the camera move as crazily as the characters? Why does the camera "panic" like they do? Never before has a film's cinematography angered me. This is worse than Michael Bay using lens flares. Even with a good use of location and a tense atmosphere that is sometimes handled well, Chernobyl Diaries is undone by idiotic characters, bad dialogue, and probably the most irritating camerawork I have ever seen in my life.

1. GHOST RIDER: SPIRIT OF VENGEANCE

The first movie was bad, so why not make a sequel to improve it? Well, you know what happened to Wrath of the Titans. That was number five on this list. Imagine a sequel trying to improve the original but ended up even worse. Multiply that by five. Your result is this year's worst movie --Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance. Though the directing style this time around is more likable and stylish than that of its predecessor, Spirit of Vengeance suffers from a wretchedly horrible script and visual effects that look like they belong in the year 2000. As for Nicolas Cage always going crazy, he is no longer entertaining here. In fact, I pity him, since he is totally ridiculing himself in this movie. Dragging Cage down to Hell with shaky camerawork and some of the dumbest one-liners ever that are comparable to Batman & Robin, Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance is a complete failure of a movie and a sequel, a film that deserves to be burned and definitely deserves the champion spot for the worst film of 2012.